Life can be that flop.

Surrounded by the people who didn’t really embracing structure led me to grow up as an organized person in a way. It wasn’t easy facing uncertainty in schedule and what to do when I was a kid. Since then, I learned how to organize my own schedule, to-do list, and how I could arrange things that need to be done. Practically, I have been that way since, perhaps, high school. I planned where I would get into school, what extracurriculars I would take, what major I would take, etc. It was smooth sailing journey with little bumps here and there until I took master degree. Things turned out different and even realer afterwards…

Like many other adults, I did plan my life the way I organized my education journey. I saw it as the way I could put my life all together. On its flipped side, life is indeed wholly different to what I expected to manage. It was harder when things turned out not the same as the way I planned out.

I had rough time to understand that plan A wasn’t enough to make things real. I learned that preparing couple options could be the most optimum strategy I could prepare for myself. I had difficulty to understand that my definition of timing might not be the best for me. I learned that timing could be so relative and easily rerouted by events surrounding us. I had tons and tons of questions for everything that happened which I demanded comprehensive answers to these. I learned that not all questions could be answered right now and, even, had the answers. I had quite handful of expectations towards other people to live up to what they said. I learned that not all people valued consistency in words and actions, pick your people wisely. To sum it all up, life is not a class where I could be a forever receiver, followed by a definitive set of rules and guidance. Life can be that flop to comprehend.

At this stage, I have tons of lessons that I learned to accept things as they are, to be present with moments I have here and now, to control what I can control while embracing uncertainty. ’Cause obviously, there is nothing certain in life, except uncertainty itself.